FlyLady - Check-in One

Our kitchen whiteboard helps me plan. Each week we list what
will be for dinner and what FlyLady's Daily Mission is.

They always say that babies don't come with instruction manuals. Well, life as a stay at home mom doesn't come with a manual either! It's actually a lot easier to find a book on how to take care of a baby than it is to find a book on how to take care of a household. I guess for some it may just be common sense, an easy transition, or skills you acquire throughout your life, but to me, it is a whole new ballgame.

Don't get me wrong, I know how to cook, do laundry, wash dishes, and the mundane that we all must do to get by, but when you're a SAHM, you have to learn to function in your house a majority of your day. On top of that, you have to learn to do it with a new little person constantly demanding attention and interrupting your every thought. (But it truly is my favorite job in the whole wide world.)

Rewind to a few months ago, when I told you about FlyLady.net and how I was hoping to follow this system on my journey to domestic bliss. Though my blog got put on the back burner (yet again) while I tried to regain control over certain aspects of life as a new SAHM, FlyLady has been something I was actually able to stick with. Believe it or not, the system is working; one Babystep at a time!

I still have a long way to go, but I'm getting better about letting go of perfection and instead getting right down to work. I've taken some pressure off myself and instead of the mess that is my house getting worse, it actually started looking better, thanks to my new outlook. Apparently, all I really needed was a place to start. As simple as it sounds, I just needed someone to tell me what to do.

I've found through working with this system, I am quite successful as long as a set teeny, tiny realistic goals for myself. Sometimes my goal is as small as: Take a Shower. Sometimes I think bigger and say: Redo Master Closet. I'm pleased with the progress I've made so far and am excited to keep going.

My next small step goal: Go to the post office (with an eight-month-old baby, that's harder than it sounds)
My next big leap goal: Create a household organizer

FlyLady - First Impressions

As I mentioned in my last post, I was introduced to a website called FlyLady. The website is all about overcoming your perfectionism and "finally loving yourself" (hence the word FLY). So what better a way for me to find domestic bliss than to follow this program!

Let me start by giving you my version of how it works. Each month, FlyLady introduces us to a new habit that we should try to incorporate into our daily routine. In addition to the monthly habit, each week we are given a "zone" in the house to focus on. For instance, this week we dedicate our time to taking care of "Zone 1" which includes: the entrance, front porch, and dining room. Since I signed up to receive the emails (free), FlyLady breaks it down even more, giving me daily missions on what specifically to do in that zone for the day. The email also includes a daily routine schedule that you should eventually adapt for everyday use. (This is just a quick overview, check out the site, FlyLady.net, for more details.)

So here are my first impressions of the FlyLady system:

Almost immediately after I signed up for the emails, I was bombarded with them! They were completely overwhelming. I wasn't sure if I needed to read all of them and I also didn't feel like I had the time to since some of them were quite long. I wondered what I had gotten myself into (there is a "lite" version with one email a day, but I was afraid that might become too easy for me to ignore).

Quickly, I realized I'm really just interested in the daily "Flight Plan" emails and deleted or set the other emails aside for the time being.  I really love how the "Flight Plan" tells me the monthly habit I need to work on, gives me a daily mission for my "zone" and includes a specific daily routine. Personally, I feel like I follow direction really well, so it definitely helps me to accomplish something. Otherwise, I tend to feel overwhelmed and don't end up doing anything!

As I said, I can become overwhelmed easily, but FlyLady has a solution for that. According to FlyLady, the best way to avoid getting overwhelmed or sidetracked is to break things down into small tasks and stick with them for 15 minutes, then move on to something else. It is true that you won't believe how much you can actually get done in 15 minutes! I kept saying I couldn't get anything done because I was too busy with my two-month old daughter or just too exhausted. It's pretty easy to squeeze in a 15 minute task during one of her naps or when my husband comes home and can relieve me for a short break. I just tell Siri on my iPhone to set a 15 minute timer and go to work. The best part is I can give myself permission to stop working on the project even if it isn't done perfectly (well honestly, I'm still working on that part)!

 

So overall, FlyLady is already helping me to see that in letting go of being perfect, our lives actually become a little more perfect and a lot less chaotic. I'm excited to continue working on both the monthly habits and the daily missions while working toward finding domestic bliss. Check back here to follow up on my progress!

Have you tried FlyLady? What do you think of the system? What works for your routine?

*Note - This review is my personal opinion. I have not been asked by the website to review it; I am just sharing my journey to domestic bliss and hope the help it provides can be a part of my success. 

Two Months Later...

Two months ago, I was trying to find something to do with all my time. Now that my little girl has arrived, I am just trying find a second to get anything done!

A lot has happened in the last two months here. My mom passed after a two and a half year battle with breast cancer. My husband's grandfather unexpectedly passed while traveling internationally. And Halle, my little bundle of joy, was born.

Needless to say the past two months have been hectic and chaotic. I've had to do a lot of life adjustments and assessments, but it's all a part of finding my domestic bliss.

Life with a newborn is far from routine, but I realize now that didn't have a good routine down anyway. Now I'm committing to finding a good routine. Recently, I was introduced to a website called FlyLady. Her website is all about letting go of perfectionism. It's perfect for me right? (No pun intended.) I'm going to use her daily emails and monthly missions to help me get my life a little bit more under control. And just maybe, I will find my domestic bliss.

Have you ever heard of FlyLady? What do you think of the website?

Keep following my adventures to see how it turns out!

Making A List, Checking It Twice

Now, Christmas may have come and gone, but I still think it's appropriate to take a cue from Santa himself. Make a list and check it twice. Recently, I've learned that this is the approach that works best for me.

So, I make a list for everything. Lately, it's the only way I've been able to get anything done. I have about a million things running through my head and countless tasks that need to be taken care of, so it's no wonder I find myself quickly overwhelmed when I'm ready to start my day.

On my journey to domestic bliss, I've been working on how to make a good, productive list instead of wasting hours making lists that I never even glance at again. I've always had a strange penchant for office supplies, weird I know, but that means that over the years I have collected a lot of different items for list-making. From post-it notes and plain white paper, to Kate Spade day planners and Apple devices, I've tried just about every mode of list-making there is.

For me, a piece of paper that says "To-Do" at the top isn't ideal. Sure it works, but it's a starting point really. It's a place where I can collect my thoughts, but it doesn't help me prioritize and it doesn't motivate me. Yes, I have to motivate myself; I have to tell myself exactly what to do and when to do it. Otherwise, I write down an incomplete list of some things that I need to do and then leave the list strewn somewhere, only to be recycled later. Usually at that point, nothing from the list is actually accomplished, but I've created an updated one somewhere else.

While I love that my iPhone, iPad, and iPod all sync together so that I have all my events and reminders are in several places, typing out specifics feels like it takes too long and it's harder to edit than just being able to quickly hand-write and scribble on. I feel somewhat limited in what I can list because of the formatting and if I have many things going on at once, they tend to get muddled together. That was the problem I was trying to solve in the first place!

I've checked out an array of websites with ideas, some that have really worked for me, and others that have failed me miserably. I'm still trying to figure out what works best for me, what ultimately will make me more productive. As I continue my journey, I will be sharing some more of these ideas and reviewing what works and what doesn't. Check back soon if you're into list-making, too. Or leave a comment below with you're favorite list-making tips!

And in the meantime, if you love visually appealing lists and organization tools, check out this adorable website I found, complete with free pre-made lists to print! Hello, Cuteness!

My Take On Thank You Notes

Today I realized it has been exactly one month since my baby shower. I figured that now was the best time to write my thank you notes while I'm still anxiously awaiting the arrival of my little girl and while I still have a free moment. As I started collecting all of the things I needed to write my thank yous, I wondered what the proper time frame for sending them out was. Was I already late? Still within the window? I decided to do some research as part of my journey to domestic bliss.

It was hard to find a definitive answer about the time frame for sending out baby shower thank yous. In general, it seems that thank you notes should be sent out within one or two weeks of receiving the gift. Personally, I think that time frame seems a little short, but maybe that's because I'm already well outside of it. Four weeks feels like an acceptable amount of time. Four weeks gives a person time to enjoy their gifts and gives them time to recover from the party that they may have had. I certainly don't want people stressing out about having to get thank yous out right away when I give them a present.

Anything longer than four weeks may be pushing it, but it seems that the rule "better late than never" applies to thank yous. I have to admit, I agree with that. If someone has generously spent their time and money to give me a gift, really the least I can do it write a little, personal note to show my gratitude. Back in September, I went out of my way to pick up a gift off a friend's wedding registry. Having never received a thank you note, I still wouldn't mind if I got one now, even though it's been over three months. It is something the perfectionist in me took notice of without even meaning to, but it is also something the imperfectionist in me understands and forgives. Do you remember when people don't send you a thank you note?

Moving past the time frame, the way I see it, the task of sending out thank yous is a two part task. There's the addressing of the envelopes and then there's the actually writing inside the card. Let's break it down.

While doing my research I saw many complaints about addressing the envelopes. Many times people suggested having guests fill out their own envelopes at the baby shower, giving the mom-to-be one less thing to do. While I've been asked to do this before, I'm not a big fan of this approach. It just seems to me that this wouldn't fall into the "proper etiquette" category. And more than that, presumably you just mailed invitations to all of these people. Here's my suggestion: Use your online address book to make address labels. Provide the host of your baby shower with one copy for invitations (something I'm sure she'd appreciate) and print off a second copy to use for your thank yous. It takes no time at all! (Every Christmas, I use this same approach. I create my labels by doing a mail merge in Microsoft Word. Our Christmas cards = domestic bliss. So why not take what works and apply it here?) I have heard the argument that it's impersonal not to hand-write the envelopes, but I think as long as you're handwriting something personal on the inside of the card, the envelope doesn't really matter. People are just going to recycle it anyway.

Now, the second part, writing the message on the inside of the card, that's the part that I find daunting. I never know exactly what to write. It's best to keep it simple, but specific. You should thank the gift-giver for their specific present, and if possible, say how you're going to use it or what you already used it for. One suggestion I came across in my research was to write in the voice as the baby. While I think it's sort of sweet, it also sounds a little bit crazy. If you're going to do that, I would say at least wait until the baby is born. My favorite tip is this: type out your message first, and then hand-write it. This may sound a little more time-consuming, but it really isn't. You can probably type a lot faster than you can write, and you can edit what you say a lot easier. It's also great for spell checking! Decide what you want to say and then quickly copy it down into the actual card.

And there you have it, my take on thank you notes! I would love to hear your thoughts on the subject, too. Comment below.